Raising Hope in Tough Times
Feeling hopeful is a powerful prerequisite for happiness. Here’s an exercise that builds hopefulness.
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Sameer was putting a good spin on it, but I could see he was hurting. There was something about his voice that made me sit up. “All senior managers are taking a fifty percent cut in base salary. Of course, there will be no bonuses. This sucks, but I guess these cost reductions will ease our cash flow for the next four months. After that if VCs are still reluctant to engage – all bets are off.”
Sameer headed a small startup in Silicon Valley that was seeking to simplify genetic testing so that it could be done by individual doctors. Until now, doctors had to take genetic material from patients and send them to a lab to test for abnormalities.
Patients often needed information on a few common genetic variations. Sameer’s startup was developing tests for these and put them in a box that could sit in a doctor’s clinic. When patients needed a test for a specific variant, the appropriate cartridge could be put in the box and the test results could be available in a few minutes rather than a few days.
The principle was exciting; the startup had a credible team, and Sameer had no problem raising money from venture capitalists. Until Covid-19. He reflected on how quickly things had changed after that. Suddenly, his firm went from being a darling of the biotech space, to just another startup that needed money.
Sameer had options. He could raise options from a foreign country. He could get bridging finance from well-known philanthropists in the area. He could even repurpose their labs to run tests for RNA strands of SARS-COV-2. As Sameer reflected on his options, his thoughts strayed constantly to his young family with whom he felt he simply wasn’t spending enough time.
As I listened to him, I felt that my usual recommendation – pay attention to your thoughts – may not help Sameer. His thoughts seemed all over the place; he couldn’t pay attention to any one or even a few of them. I remembered an exercise I prescribe in my classes and hoped it would help him.
Expressive Writing – The Origins in Trauma
In 1986 James Pennebaker published an article suggesting that people who experienced trauma would benefit from writing about it. In a review article published twenty years later, he cited incontrovertible evidence that the exercise worked. Despite not understanding the mechanism, the writing exercise provided psychological and physical benefits for trauma survivors.
He speculated that the value of writing lay in giving language to the thoughts and feelings associated with the trauma. People who wrote about their trauma, perceived improved psychological well-being better physical health as seen in fewer visits to a doctor or lower uses of medication. The positive effects of these writing exercises have been seen in widely varying contexts – poor college grades, job losses and even diagnoses of cancer.
This approach to dealing with trauma gave birth to a similar exercise that builds hope. The remainder of this note describes that exercise. However, if you need to work on a past trauma, you will find guidance here. My goal in this note is to help people like Sameer feel more hopeful about the future.
Building Hope
We know that hope can be a powerful driver of happiness. It’s hard to feel happy when the future looks hopeless. Yet, sometimes, it’s hard to hold on to hope during a pandemic like Covid. The psychologist Tim Wilson adapted Pennebaker’s expressive writing exercise to one that enhances hope.
It takes time to develop the habits of mindfulness that I described previously (Watching Thoughts). By contrast, the exercise below can be completed in a relatively short period.
This exercise is ideally done at the end of the day, when you’re less likely to be distracted by things that need to be done. Find a quiet spot where you will not be interrupted. Keep writing materials with you – pen and paper or an electronic device on which you can type or write work equally well.
Visualize a time in the future – three to five years away – when you have achieved your goals.
For twenty minutes without stopping, write what you did to achieve them. Don’t only write about what success looks like, write about the actions you took that enabled the success.
Repeat the process for a total of four days in a row. You can write about the same thing every day or, you can write about different things. On each day, however, write for no more than twenty minutes.
Airport bookstores often contain titles that scream at you that something good will happen to you if just wish it. You would be right to conclude that wishing alone is unlikely to make things happen.
This exercise differs from simply wishing. It reminds you of the things you can and should do to achieve the future you seek. It gives you back a sense of control. When I asked Sameer to try the exercise, he was reluctant – Narayan, I don’t need one more thing to do. I persisted. When we spoke the following weekend, he had done the exercises and sounded much more positive.
I run this exercise frequently in my programs. This is what some of my participants have said.
“I was feeling down when you told me to do this exercise. I came out of it energized at the thought that there were many things I could do.”
“I find myself remembering things I know I can do but have forgotten in the daily business of fighting fires. I find I get perspective again.”
I did a program with you many years ago Narayan and remember thinking I was taking so many things away. I’ve forgotten a lot of things since then, but I remember this exercise. I still do it once every few years. You were right, it makes me feel more hopeful.”
Try it. You might feel more hopeful too.
